ellen, Im sorry you havent felt better.
this is not my first stay in a hospital, but this one is the hardest Ive ever done, and Ive been in for back surgeries and melanoma and reconstructive surgery.
a hospital is the last place on earth to sleep. patients who sleep are either totally exhausted or drugged.
I find it amazing that at 11pm the loud speakers go off in everyroom and the message is Lisa, you have a phone call!
they wake everyone on the floor. the sirens and bells, the constant moaning of other patients, nurses yapping, and lets face it, those gurneys are not made to induce a nice nights sleep.
the hospital treats conditions.
you cant heal or rest in a hospital.
Im sure there are some, but I am about ready to claw myself out of here.
I had a full house of company tonight, I even think my niece isnt talking to me after she said I gave her a heart attack almost(Imy friend asked, hey, what happens if your pump unplugs, and I said, dunno, unplug it, and when he did, my niece was objecting loudly, he pulled the plug, I immediately fell back on the bed like I passed out, and my niece almost went ballistic. Cant a sick guy have some fun?)
full house of company, but it doesnt make it easier when these late hours come with the isolation, the feeling of loneliness, almost as if this will never end. and I love going away alone, never bothered me, but this is just way too depressing.
Im not promising myself I will be healthy after this, I know this beast will not die easily.
but I also know most I spoke with started with my symptoms, and now are in worse shape, so I agreed to try something that my doc feels will be very rewarding for me.
halfway through the third dose, Im counting the hours.
feel good everyone.