Ah Waves...does sound a bit overwhelming!! So much of what you said I can relate to that it makes my head spin...too much for me to respond to right now. I need my cave for a bit myself. I agree with Bizi on the benzo. I have experienced myself and have seen others too suffer depression and other SE's after working to reduce off of it. Strangely enough we have to add a med sometimes to get off of another, and then get off of the one we added. But, it can all work out in the long run.
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.