Bobby was in the hospital for about 10 days due to his heart last month. I did not know this till recently. Bobby and I had a bad falling out not long after his heart attack. We got back on good terms this past Friday. He told me tonight that there's nothing that can be done about his cancer. I'm so sad. Bobby is like an old shoe to me. He's put up with more than his share of crap from me over the past 10 months. He's seen me in all kinds of states of mind which even my ex husband has not seen some of those parts of me. He still likes me with my faults and everything. I have not felt this from anyone that I can ever recall except my mom.

Bobby never liked my drinking and I can see why. Once I had a few more than my share to drink and told him I had seen his truck at Hanks. He told me I should have stopped in and I told him I was in a hurry to get home and drink my beer. Leave it to a drunk to be honest. He put up with me the other time I called him up 3 times in one night drunk and kept repeating myself. He's never cursed me even the time I cursed him so bad it would have made a sailor blush. He had confidence in me to tell me to enter a photo contest on the weather channel last fall. Once some one at Hanks told Bobby he was a gentleman for getting up and letting me get out of the booth to use the bathroom. Bobby told the guy he had to let me up or else I'd squish him crawling over him. We use to have so much fun at Hanks last summer. He would tell the people in there funny things I would do.

I can't lose Bobby with his cancer. I just can't. I know it is likely to happen though.