Thank you all for responding. I feel much calmer having heard from you. I'm formulating a plan and trying to get priorities arranged. I'm in Missouri now but next month I'm moving back home to Ohio, just outside Cleveland. I have an appointment lined up with my psychiatrist there, I will see if he can refer me to the Cleveland Clinic.

But, until then I've got to try to be as active as I can, concentrate on QUITTING SMOKING (I had been quit for 16 years before I came down here 3 years ago to help with my fathers care and passing which happened in July). I do not drink or take drugs, antidepressants only make me worse anymore, I have a pretty good diet including vitamins and supplements.

I will prepare myself for a possibly drawn-out process of seeking diagnosis, I know it may also be a quick and simple matter... The main thing for me is to persevere and to avoid my usual pattern of easy discouragement, apathy, disgust, etc. and then giving up.

Because I tend to isolate and enjoy living alone, forums like this are extremely valuable when they are made up of friendly caring people like you all seem to be here.