I had a very long appreciative note that disappeared this morning to everyone here..and now I will have to do the readers digest of it..but first..Bobber..thank you for your compliment in that I have much strength..that is so nice to hear and I need it now.. you are such a good guy!! HFTB..you are sweet in thinking of how we can gather out thoughts and do the right thing..no regrets possible and the love for our parents..both Mom's and Dad's is unmeasureable... we have had many talks..my brothers and I and I am the only one local my nearest brother is in Albany NY and then Texas and the one in Arizona...I am the youngest and only girl of our four children.. as far as talking to Mom well she has moderate demensha..so what we say now will not be there in an hour or so but I believe in complete honesty with her except..the C word will scare her so I will nudge it without saying it so not to scare her.. but I will tell her about what is happening... just before it has to be.. Ada.. I got your PM ..you are such a breathe of fresh air...and loved hearing from you...PM me anytime!! So sorry for your news and experience with this stuff also...I have heard about the sudden spread of this.... that makes our decision harder too... but I have to say..We have chose to do the surgery..it is a 2/1 by the Dr.'s but my brothers and I see no other way as her demensha at this time does not stand in the way of her knowing us..sharing a giggle or even splitting a hot fudge sundea at the end to the day..so I am not giving in to her mental status..Due to my pain..everyday all day...I know what it is like, as we all do here and I do not want her to live in awful pain due the obstruction as it gets larger so it must come out before it is too late....AND if..god help us..something terrible happens following or during the surgery...she will be in less pain then..then she will be in a year from now once the tumor grows.... in my heart with all of my heart..., I believe she will be in a much more beautiful place with my Dad..and she will be pain free...!! However.. that will break my heart in two but we have to let god take charge. What a week..

Much love and so many thanks for your support and honesty and love!

Kathy