Colleen thank you for sharing your brother Sean with us. I'm so sorry that he left you in this manner.

Journaling is a good way to deal with grief and you're offering hope and help to others who are going through this nightmare...I have found that being around other survivors, even on the internet, is comforting. Please be very kind to yourself..you are early on this grief journey.
Here is the link to our Survivors of Suicide Forum...
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum29.html
We are here for you.