Hi there. I have just been catching up about you. I must admit I am worried that you have not taken time off work or told your employer about your injury. Like you I would never ever have believed that this could happen to me, nor would I have believed it if somebody had told me what PCS is like.

I have now had 8 years of PCS. (mine is a result of cumulative injuries)

I firmly believe it has stayed with me because I never took the time off work (law) soon enough. I struggled on working full time - I could hardly read, couldn't remember letters I had written, settlement dates etc etc.

Fortunately I didn't do anything to shocking or, alternatively nothing caught up with me before I stopped working 2 years ago. I seemed to have been operating on remote. I was doing the work but didn't have any recollection! With clients I would forget what I was talking about mid sentence - I became very good at covering that up.

I forced myself to go to work each morning, dragged myself out of bed, did my usual dressing and make up, drove to work and put a smile on my face and my brain felt like it was screaming and burning.

My A&E doctor told me that there was nothing wrong with me and he knew about people like me - like I was fraudulent - I who was like Mrs perfect goody two shoes who never made a mistake, who lived in the lovely house on the hill with 2 teenagers and the golden retriever. That has all gone.

I finally found a good GP and neuropsychologist (Dorothy Gronwell) but could never understand or get my head around the fact that there is absolutely no use in pushing yourself to do anything and/or every thing if you don't feel like it -doing that prolongs and exagerates the symptoms. Dorothy used to talk to me about waiting to get better. I didn't have any patience with anybody let alone myself. You have to be kind to yourself, avoid the noise, bright lights, stress - at one stage I couldn't even deal with the decision of deciding what to have for dinner.

Dorothy immediately told me to stop working and take a month off work then to complete further testing and we would decide on a plan of action - unfortunately she had a heart attack and died. Since then I have had to fight with our Accident Compensations system and have never been able to work full time since. I was sent for all sorts of assessments = specialists who appeared to know less than me who criticised me for knowing so much about PCS.

When I got my hours up to 6 a day my blood pressure went crazy, hospital and back down to 3 hour days, then 2 years ago I was fired by a developer client - that was the end of me - I simply couldn't cope with that and it was the last straw and I haven't worked since.

I guess what I am trying to tell you is -or recommend that you do is; stop working, avoid all stress and find a health professional who understands PCS.

As I psychologist recently said to me "Ask yourself - what would I say if this was a friend that had this PCS?"

Lynlee

Sorry if I have waffled on it is late here and way past my bedtime - so time consuming trying to put this together - Mark seems to be a lot more patient and perservering than me!

I now take zopilcone and nortryptiline at night and usually sleep well. I wake up feeling about 60% which is alot better than previously.