Thank you for all these thoughtful responses. Yes, "the person" craved and sometimes needed the drinks... to relax... to ease pain... to mellow out...

"The person" has not had a drink in many months other than 1 with friends over the holidays. No drinking... on purpose, to show it is not an addiction and not alcoholism.

And it has not been easy or comfortable, but the idea that this is healthier and better, is a comfortable thought. Hard not to give in, though. Especially knowing it isn't alcoholism, so it is OK...

Perhaps this was close to "alcoholism" without the alcoholic genes.