Bless your heart.

No one can understand when something like that happens. This young man is sick. Extremely sick. I'm not saying you have to feel sorry for him by any means, but if he was on Crystal Meth, he did NOT know what he was doing ~ he was in some kind of "fog" and anything could have happened. I wish to God your poor Father hadn't been the victim.
I know what it is to lose a parent. I've lost both mine, and I feel like an orphan ~ even at my advanced age! There are so many times I want to call my Mom and ask her a question or call Dad and ask him help with something. You NEVER lose the need for your parents, even if it's just to cry on their shoulders.

All I CAN tell you is your Dad IS WITH YOU. You might feel his presence once in awhile.

It's NOT your imagination, dearheart. He IS there with you, watching over you.
And remember ~ we WILL be reunited with them one day. God bless you and you and your Dad will be in my prayers. Take care. Hugs, Lee