Dear Bobby,
Yes, the process is sometimes more important than the product.
I hope you can reach peace with your efforts to help your friend.

We take on a lot from our childhood years and then spend the rest of our lives getting rid of it. That's my observation anyway.

I hope you can get out of your depression.
Having a task that you describe where the other person is dependent on me, can be draining and I start to get depressed/rebel/get annoyed....

I wish you peace.
Mari