Mari
It may be to afford yourself the protection of the ADA that you may have to. Just a doctors note stating hormonal imbalance is preventing a full day of activity, then make sure too, are you healthy medically, the vitamin's, the iodine, thyroid, etc.

Sleep deprived; I wondered if it is like a person that uses the food deprivation, as a means of control......
I use sleep as a control. Not entirely sure why I cheat sleep; then sleep during the day.

There is far too much in my life I can not control, but to stay up, and stay up...sometimes, a lot of the times until daybreak, I control.

I do not even try to make a bed time routine, I do not want to give up hours of my time. The time the world is finally peaceful and letting me alone.

If I had a normal sleep pattern, my life would be normal....it is not though.

My mind is cluttered, so many things that need to be taken care of and no energy or drive to do much if any of it.

I am tight chested, no relaxing, like an over-wound watch. How does sleep happen for that?
I don't feel I deserve peaceful sleep. I deserve chaos, I should be flipping out.

I do not even try to do anything that would help. Like relaxation, bio-feed back, a pattern, darkness, smooth sheets.

Boy am I a bad influence for you. If you want to sleep, to have a pattern?
I can admit that I do not.....but, we have work, people that depend on us, and how the heck do we force our self to sleep?

I do not want to take Ambien, I would fight it and be worse. I do not want a glass of wine, I want WHINE!!!!!

Not healthy but it is what it is..... I wish for you to have the sand man decide to ease you back into a pattern you want of sleep.

I guess one day, I can take the rubber bands wound up and hand them off to actually look forward to my sleep at night....
That is a whole other set of panic attacks though....
When I sleep, I can not control my environment, I am venerable, I could be in a tornado, fire, stupid worries all the time.

In our house, I guess it is part of the PTSD, we take turns to sleep. The two kids and I. I wait for the youngest to sleep and the middle kiddo, 27, to wake up and he keeps watch. When I wake up, then he will go to sleep. We always have someone awake......

I wish I had an answer, I wish for you to have a detox of the anxiety dear friend.
Hugs
di