my uncle died yesterday - dad's brother. we got word from his other brother. he had some problems in the past but recently was well. he started feeling ill so the family called an ambulance. he had a heart attack in the ambulance and two hours later in the hospital something else happened and he died. doctors were unclear as to cause of death. so, the family requested an autopsy which i think was sensible. hopefully then we will know something more.

funeral is tuesday. we have to travel so we are leaving monday, staying overnight, and returning tuesday night.

i just talked to my cousin to get some details on the arrangements because my dad didn't want to "bother" them, but my mom is going nuts because she is trying to sort out how we can travel with his medication which needs refrigeration. my cousin seemed to appreciate the call. she was very nice. we are not usually in touch so we exchanged cell phone numbers to facilitate further communications.

when she answered the phone and i told her that i was sorry about her dad, a huge lump suddenly materialized in my throat and i almost choked on the words.

i last saw my uncle when i was little. i mostly lived on the other side of the atlantic. the past years in europe, i have wanted to go visit, but due to circumstances on there side or ours, that didn't happen. and now he's gone and i am sad. i am sad for my dad too.

this is the first of my parents' siblings to have died and it makes my parents' mortality glare out at me too.

~ waves ~ of sadness keep coming over me.