Hi,

One team member is pre-occupied with cancer treatments that have ben ongoing since July 09. Only one probably noticed goofy things in my speech -- saying one word when I mean another close word, not having word recall, . . . the third knows that I have been struggling in a general sense but this has been a difficult work year for all of us.

My leadership keeps us together on the same path.
I'm proud of that. We accomplished a hugely important task yesterday. My people were amazing. My news of the stroke was small compared to the other stuff we had to cover. And my news was old news and not something we had to discuss. I'm glad for that.


(I had told a woman colleague back in October or so about the stroke and she was supportive in a general way. We have not talked about that since. I did not invite her to this recent meeting. I wanted the meeting to be very focused.)

When I came home from work yesterday and saw the news of Beau Biden's stroke I felt bad for him, but I also thought about other people like me who are of similar age to him who have strokes that docs can't explain. Likely, my colleagues saw the same news and saw that strokes can happen.

I guess I was thinking somehow that the stroke was my fault and did not want to talk about it.
Also my horrible parents and I have had exactly ONE conversation about this (one convo with Dad and a different convo with Mom). With both convos I reassured them that I was going to be ok.
Even when they came to seem me in Sept then refused to talk about it.
-->> Sometimes I hate them.

I was ashamed.
Better better now with time . . . .also with Beau Biden in the news.


M.