I figured I wasn't alone in this mess.

I did go to see my Dr. this evening. It had been snowing off and on all day but it wasn't piling on and the sun came out to melt it some. I thought well i'll go ahead and go since it's not bad.

When I left the Drs. office it was snowing and already had over an inch and was like a blizzard coming home. I drove about 20 miles an hour all the way, it was worse out in my area. I couldn't see the lines on the highway. When cars came toward me I knew I was in the wrong lane. I thought about picking up my boys but decided I didn't want to take a chance with them.

I can't believe this crap. I got all of my spickets dripping. It's suppose to get to 7 tonight. Friday night it's suppose to get to around 5 and lots of snow. I am having trouble even getting out to pay bills. I have to have Susan to pay them for me by phone. They are paying the ones I can't pay. I'm very blessed with those two. Travis called me Sunday night to tell me to hand Susan any bills I can't pay and he'll pay them. He wants to get my house paid off and get me moved into a smaller place and have this for a rental for extra money. He's making the plans and I'm find with them. I have 10 more payments on my home and it's mine. It's a long 10 months though because I lost Bill's income and only have mine to live on. I was very worried about it and cried a lot until Travis called me.

Losing Bill gets harder instead of easier. The man only had a 6th grade education but he was one of the smartest people I ever knew. He kept up with everything going on in the world and knew how to do everything. If something could be fixed he could do it.

He was disabled for years but he did so much for the elderly and disabled. He would take them to Drs., he would take groceries to them and he would haul people anywhere they needed to go most always for no pay.

All of Susan's friends called on him for everything they couldn't do from installing a dishwasher to fixing pipes and cars. Her friends thought of him as their Dad. He made them laugh and would pull jokes on them and they loved having him around.

He spoiled me rotten. We were together 34+ years and everyone that knew us said we were made for each other. We had our ups and downs like everyone do. I mostly got mad at him. He would laugh when I wouldn't say I loved him and say that's ok, I know you do. I use to say he was smug.

My Mom and Dad worshiped him and thought of him as their own and my family loved him. They called and talked to both of us all of the time from Ky. I just didn't have the same luck with his family but his kids love me.

We had a rough time because he was disabled for so many years but we still had about anything we needed. We did antiquing on the side to keep going and he loved redoing furniture and being around people.

I can honestly say he was one of the best people I have ever known. I am pregadist but I also know this is all true about him.

He was good looking, smart, funny, sometimes too funny, I couldn't have a serious conversation with him. I know that I would have to look a long long time to find someone to even come close to how he was. I always say he was from the old school.

I knew at the funeral how much he was loved by the people there and everyone that talks about him when I see them.

I just wanted to write this to let you know kind of what my life was with him. I was proud of him all of the time. Mad at times but still proud.

I was lucky to have these years with him. I told my Dr. today who is one of my best friends that what bothered me the most is that I couldn't get well in time for us to get back to somewhat of a normal life together. I tried harder the last year or so because I knew what shape he was in and I knew when the time was getting near but I just couldn't get to the point where we could enjoy more things together with him.

I hope this doesn't bore you guys but I just wanted to share this with you.

Thanks for all of the support you guys have given me. Coming here to talk to you guys helps keep me going.
Ada