Dej.......I haven't dealt with it in the volume you have but I kind of know what you mean. My MIL is very mean spirited. She wasn't always like this.....or at least didn't show it while I was married to her son. She probably just did a good job at hiding it. Once he was gone....out came her claws. She doesn't even contact her grandchildren. And they don't even miss her!

I won't go into all the hateful things she's said and done since he died.......but I know how hurtful it can be. Even when it's from someone you don't really care about having a close relationship with.

These people have a screw loose.......and I just flat refuse to get caught up in the drama. I make no effort or attempt at communication and that leaves her no opportunity to inflict her "screwiness" on me and my family. We're better off without her in our lives. And you're better off without the hatefulness your family dishes out, too.

I felt selfish for a long time but don't anymore. Some people there is just no reasoning with. No matter how hard you try. And if they act like they are warming up......it's just a ploy. At least with my situation it is.

I've moved on and refuse to let those toxic people dump on me anymore. I hope you'll move on and not let your family impose on your life anymore. It sounds like you and DH have a nice life together. Just enjoy that and let the others wallow in their own venom.