The good news is had two therapists who were successful with him. I pushed him to go to counseling. The first therapist dealt with issues related to his horrible father. That was quite exhausting therapy and hubby got a lot out of it. He's pretty much over his issues with his father that had been holding him back emotionally and otherwise.
The second therapist followed up on what had been accomplished with the first and even fine tuned it.

Recently, hubby reminded me that that second therapist told him that his antenna is too high and must be lowered -- he is too much on high alert. He was not able to work more with that therapist due to circumstances but also partly because that therapist thought that hubby was a therapy success and did not need anymore.

When I first met him he had no money and was not buying CDs, DVDs, books. I did not recognize hoarding tendencies.

A little later he was learning about CDs from the Romantic tradition with lots of emotion. He found them calming. He would purchase some if he was especially anxious.

We are both on our second marriage. We've been together for 15 years and married for about 5 of those years.

He is not interested in talk therapy. He does exercise a lot -- yoga, weightlifting with a trainer, jogging, . . . His eating a very good diet is partly in response to a need to work on himself. . . .

I recognize in part that the exercise might be fueled by a desire to reduce anxiety. In any case, it does seem to help him.

He is partly aware of need to change, but does not want help at this time.

In two weeks, one of his summer jobs with ease up and I can talk to him again when he is relaxed.

M.