Ol'Cs,

Thank you for the honest, heartfelt post. I am sorry that you now face losing a relationship to whatever it is we have (I don't even believe we all have the same thing other than similar symptoms). Some days I ask myself hasn't enough already been taken away? What else next? I try to keep in mind that many things have also been given to me as well. Things that so-called healthy people have never nor will ever have the joy to experience. I guess I try to temper the pain and sense of loss I feel with that, but it does not make me feel any better per se.

I am youngish and have had some relationship issues surrounding my diagnosis, plus I have a young child to raise. I largely hold it together for his sake, but some days...

Know that it sucks to have the wind taken out of your sails with a PD diagnosis in the first place, let alone to be with someone who does not have your back in the most trying of times. As much as it may suck and tick you off just know that in the end, ironically, your health may improve a bit. I know first hand that being in a failing or failed relationship can cause a tremendous amount of stress which in turn will make your symptoms worse. I imagine that you may actually note some improvement over time.

As for being single again...well, I know it will not be the easiest thing in the world to tell others of the PD diagnosis. However, it is an excellent litmus test. If someone can't handle it up front, then no time wasted. There are many good, kind people out there who will see you/us as a nuanced, whole, wonderful person and not as a set of symptoms or a burden.

Hang in there.

Laura