Dear Bobby

i believe it was a positive experience because it brought you forward and answered some questions even if the answers weren't what you hoped.

- you ran up against some limitations
- you learned that some things won't work - now you can move on to other things that might work
- you stopped torturing yourself over wanting a dog and not daring...
- you made a very responsible, but difficult decision to get a dog and deal with the what ifs
- you made a very responsible, but difficult decision, to rehome Luc

i wish i had your courage! i am glad you feel relieved.

inertia does breed inertia but i think the feeling safe has a lot to do with it. feeling unsafe also produces anxiety. ongoing depression does not help contrast inertia - one breeds the other. i see it as a multifaceted situation, not an either-or. try not to think in terms of just doing one thing at any given time, not the whole situation. the idea of not being able to hole up is probably threatening right now. just take things as they come. invite yourself to go out and think of it as just that one time. we have to force ourselves to be miopic sometimes just not to scare ourselves out of something.

i hope you can stay on the diet and you will surely lose more weight if you do - you have done so well thus far, i am so proud of you.



yoga or exercises would help me but they do not replace running.

i like running/jogging and it burns a lot and fast. it will build up my lung capacity, burn fat, good cardio workout and i only need 20 mins to do that. you can burn the same walking with less impact but it requires more time. the pace also forces me into a very focused state.

i don't feel embarrassed running - at least not enough to stop me, most of the time. i would, on the other hand, feel very awkward doing yoga/floor exercises either at home OR outside. just stretching is hard enough, and i have been trying to do that because of my arm. for running i will have to do specific stretches also (trying not to think about that. !!!) i don't have money to go to gyms take classes etc etc etc etc.

love

waves