Last night was my first experience with a meltdown related to MG. I have cried my fair share over learning about what I have but last night was new. I was at a women's bible study but my legs had been really hurting all day (dull achy pain throughout both of them) and my muscles I could tell were getting weaker. So I got a pillow from my friends room and layed on their cushioned floor. It didnt help much other than not sitting which was worse. Afterwards I got up and sat on the couch to gather my stuff together. When I tried to get up, I couldnt. My legs would work. I realized I would need to ask for help from my girlfriends to get up. I am a very independent person so asking for help is not a strength of mine. So I turned to them and before the words came out I started bawling. Literally rivers of tears just pouring down my face. And somehow manage to whisper of plee for help in getting up.

I felt terrible because I am pretty sure I snapped at my roommate who was trying to help by taking my stuff. I didnt want her to take my stuff, I just wanted help up. I felt awful. I somehow was able to drive home still but bawled the whole way home, yelling at God that I am not an 80-year-old woman and I should be able to get up off a chair without help. Then I just broke down because I knew He was crying with me and hates seeing me in pain.

It was freeing for me to feel all that. It sucks that I took it out on my friends a little but I am thankful they love me the same.

I just wanted to share that all with you.

Peace, Stephanie