Sweetheart,

Will you adopt me?? Can I be your sister???
I wish I were closer so that I could be the sister you need to lean on!!

Some would call this irony, I like to call this God at work...
just minutes ago I received this message from a dear friend of mine whom I had just shared my Workman's comp. saga with...
she sent this...

A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day,
drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother.
As they talked about life, about marriage,
about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood,
the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully
and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter.

"Don't forget your Sisters,"
she advised, swirling the tea leaves
to the bottom of her glass.

"They'll be more important as you get older.
No matter how much you love your husband,
no matter how much you love the children you may have,
you are still going to need Sisters.
Remember to go places with them now and then;
do things with them.
"Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women...
your girlfriends, your daughters,
and all your other women relatives too.
"You'll need other women. Women always do."

"What a funny piece of advice!,
the young woman thought.
Haven't I just gotten married?
Haven't I just joined the couple-world?
I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake!
A grownup!
Surely my husband and the family we may start
will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!

But she listened to her Mother.
She kept contact with her Sisters
and made more women friends each year.
As the years tumbled by, one after another,
she gradually came to understand
that her Mom really knew what she was talking about!
As time and nature work their changes
and their mysteries upon a woman,
Sisters are the mainstays of her life.

After more than 50 years of living in this world,
here is what I've learned:

THIS SAYS IT ALL:

Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Careers end.

BUT.........

Sisters are there, no matter how much time
and how many miles are between you.
A girl friend is never farther away than needing her can reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley
and you have to walk it by yourself,
the women in your life will be on the valley's rim,
cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf,
and waiting with open arms at the valley's end.
Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you...
Or come in and carry you out.

Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in-law, sisters,
sisters-in-law, Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins,
and extended family, all bless our life!
The world wouldn't be the same without women,
and neither would I.

When we began this adventure called womanhood,
we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead.

Pass this on to all the women
who help make your life meaningful.
I just did.


All though this story mentions children growing up and leaving home, and a lot of life's other milestones it doesn't begin to address the devestating grief that you and Ada now know and live with.

I am so, so terribly sorry for both of you, for the unfathomable loss that you both are trying to accept and learn how to live with; the moment to moment coping skills needed to get you through something this grievous are beyond my understanding.

I am so grateful for this community of sisters and brothers I can come to when my Spirit is crushed, and I am so grateful that we can all come here to seek support and understanding.This is a very special place!!

Take care of yourselves Di and Ada, allow yourselves to not be "the rock". You both need to allow yourselves all the feelings you need to feel, all the tears you need to cry, what ever it takes to allow yourselves to grieve this devastating loss; of which only time and healing will slowly and eventually dull the intensity. If you can find a support group that you are comfortable in, or a supportive church group, or women's group that could encourage you and help strengthen you, that could be very be helpful. Maybe they could be "the rock" for the time being...?

I will keep you both in my prayers!!

God Bless,

G ~