Dear Bizi

i think about how many moms do this stuff and more ... *all the time* ... and i can't seem to feel good about it.

i didn't feel up to it, really. i pushed myself through it, a bit at a time. it was hard mentally as well as physically.

my mom is just beaming and has said more than once she can see the difference. i am glad she can, because i can't. where i made a big difference is all back under and behind things... places that aren't usually exposed and you don't see.

i don't feel like doing anything. anything i do, i push myself through it. but so far today i haven't even been able to push myself to clean my poor plant. it is not doing well because i forgot to water it for a time. i look at it and feel even worse, and ... think about something else. sigh. i slept 7 hours but still feel tired and kinda sleepy. everything in my body hurts too - like i worked out.

~ waves ~