I was just thinking( Oh OH) and maybe it would be good to go to a womans resourse center. Sometimes they have connections to physicians who others can attest to that they are good and listen. It took me lot of trys, but it was indeed through referal, that finally got me the proper doctors. I am not the most stable person, nor the sharpest knife in the drawyer,but I did find the help by being persistant, actually angry about my whole situation. All of it happened right at the time I had to have the help medically. I have surgery on monday fussion C3-7. I wanted to post again, to tell you not to give up even if you have told your story a billion times. I posted to broken wings, as she is the one who is really coaching me through my terrors and nerves. You are the other one I was thinking about. I don't want you to give up. I can't eithor, and my fears are real too. Be good to yourself, and I will try to catch up with youwhen my hospital stay is finished. I kept your thread in my e-mail. take care, ginnie