Hi, I totally understand what you are going through right now. I had to give up my career of 30 years when this monster hit me. You do have one great advantage right now and that is your education. While you may not be able to work the long hours required in a big firm, you may have other options available to you that you have not yet thought about. But right now, you may just need to give yourself time to grieve and to grow used to this new you. One thing that I found to be helpful to me was that I now have time to attend church and become involved with some of the activities there. When you are working long hours, and weekends you tend to not take the time to care for your spirit in the way a church family can care for you. I would also think that perhaps your abilities could be of use in many ways that could accommodate your disability now. Perhaps teaching, volunteering at your library or senior center. I do hope that you have looked into SSDI as this can be a very long process, but if you do qualify you will be eligable for Medicare. To know that I did have insurance was of great relief to me. Of course I do agree that nobody says it better than Kathy. I really hope to hear more from you soon. Blessings, Lisa