wow...it's not only me.....i try to explain to others that my brain is working,when i try to talk,but somehow the connection is not making it to my mouth..i start to talk and the words just don't come out or they come out all wrong...feel foolish and go back to being quiet and just listen and fade into the backround..
i havae to check 3-4 times for where i put things..car keys,pocketbook..sometimes leave house and have to return home to take off slippers and put shoes on...
use to read at least 2-3 books a week..now i read the same words over and over,then the sme sentence..reading is no longer enjoyable anymore(add it to the list)
i write everything down..all the time..even the smallest of things these days--so afraid i will need the info at some point and won't remember it..
been in a really bad,bad place lately...trying to fight the depression and pain from taking over--not helping--
wish so many others wouldn't depend on me to always be there--but they do--can't let anymore people i love down--i am trying so hard.. feel like i am failing..
my great friend just had a baby girl****such a beauty**** so proud of her to have so much strength (she is mostly on her own--baby's father out of state and out of mind) i am trying to be strong for her and help her as much as i can--phone calls--at least 20x's daily...she wants me to be her god-mother...can i accept knowing i am unable to function most of the time??? sorry this has gotten very long...
wish my dark thoughts would ease up some...losing what little sanity i have left...........sorrry-----linda