Wow. It sounds like I could be talking to myself a while ago. I've got PN, failed lumbar spine surgery (so eventually a hoveround for me) and severe osteoporosis in my lumbar spine and I'm only 47. I do my best to keep focusing on the positive. I can get people to do things for me that I can't do anymore. People listen to me as though I have the wisdom of the ages (I love that). When I do get my hoveround I'm buying all the really cool shoes that I can't wear now. I won't be walking in them so I'll have stunning looking feet without damaging my spine. And I'm very eager to turn 50. I plan on having a half-century party. I'm in pain ALL THE TIME. Even with the multitude of meds I take there really isn't any relief. So one thing I found is to focus on helping other people. It really keeps my mind from turning on itself. I try to help as many people as I can. Even if that help is just telling them a joke to make them smile. For me, I feel like if I can't help those around me, what's the point in breathing in? I hope you find whatever it is to pull you out of your funk. I can't tell you what will work for you, only let you know what works for me and pray you find your own way. Best of luck to all of us!