The first timeI had a trigger point injection to what I feel is the burning golfball on my neck, I had total relief for a few hours.....until the lidocaine wore off. As my husband was driving me home I was sooooo excited. I could go back to work (that was before I had SSDI so we were hurting for money), go out with my friends, play with the kids, get back into my hobbies.

We got home and I was excited to start my first chore. My house has become a sty. I went to do some laundry.....which there was mountains of.....and realized my work wordrobe was at the bottom of the clothes mountain and I would have to wash ALL of it. Panic attack started. I had let my nursing license expire because I could not concentrate to do my CEU's or afford to pay for them and my license. Panic attack escalating. How would I arrange after school care for my kids ? What if my employer wouldn't rehire me ? I was really freaking out as if I would be expected to show up at work the next day because I was so unprepared.

By the time I finished calling family and friends to share the joy that I was cured (while trying to hide the panic), the lidocaine wore off.............




I think to survive this we HAVE to redefine our normal and plan a life around our limitations. The thought of changing everything that you do all around again is overwhelming. Even though an improvement in pain levels is a good thing (or GREAT thing !), it's still another big change.

Imagine you are pregnant. You're excited about having a family, but have some moments of panic about rearranging your life. Maybe even some reservations because you can't drink anymore, won't be able to party with friends, it could limit your career adavancement, how will you manage financially.......all kinds of worries even though it's a happy event. You're dealing with all of these conflicting emotions......then you learn it's triplets. That's happy news, but an even bigger change which is an even bigger stressor.

Any big change......like a potential for pain relief, is going to bring some doubts and ambivalent feelings.

Our fingers will be crossed for you that the ketamine works. Try to save the worrying about how life will/may change with the treatment until after you see if it even works for you. Easier said than done