What I am about to share is a tad lengthy, highly personal and possibly highly charged for some of you. Having said that, should this post be considered out of line for this board and forum I would understand its deletion by the moderators. I've come to value your insights and various points of view, thus my reason for posting it here. So, here we go.........

You all pretty much know my situation by now and time is an element to be considered seriously. You also know I am taking my wife on her lifetime dream vacation, a 14 day cruise to Hawaii, first class all the way on Princess Cruise Lines, very soon.

Here is the potentially dangerous family challenge. I was just notified tonight, by mobile phone text no less, that my 86 year old mother has been admitted to the hospital with a severe UTI, moving into renal failure and it looks like the rest of her body is shutting down. She has advanced dementia, no longer recognizes me and due to my physical situation I have not seen my Mom and Dad since October of last year. They could not comprehend my situation nor deal with it at all. Very complicated. They are both in an assisted living center.

Here is my position and belief. We are all spiritual beings having a human experience within a cycle of life. Once that spirit/soul leaves the body you have nothing but an empty biological container. I make it a practice of going to a viewing to support the family but have no desire to "look at the body." Why? That's not the person I knew, they're gone. I prefer to remember people in their best situation, not lying in a coffin. Funerals are for the living. I am at peace with both my Mom and Dad with no regrets should I never see them alive again. Neither has the capacity to know who I am with the severe dementia and advanced Alzheimer's.

It is my position should my Mom, or my Dad, pass on while we are on this trip, or just before leaving, we will not be returning or staying for a funeral. We have a huge financial and emotional investment in this major vacation and forfeiting it will be of no benefit to either of my parents.

I don't feel any guilt for having that position, I have no concern with what others in the family may think. I just know it will create some discussion, possible shock due to perceived disrespect, and I appearing not to have my priorities in line.

I would not place you in a position of asking, "What would you do and why?" However, I would appreciate your insights into this situation and realizing these are only your opinions, I give no guarantee of them affecting my final result. In fact, I may be totally out of line presenting this situation to you guys.

So, comments, insights, thoughts, verbal abuse?