That is a huge thing, the rejecting the lable. But accepting help is needed. The one experiance I had with my dd was that the med's their self specifically SSRI made her act innapropriate, paranoid, and aggressive with me. Especially Effexor, but that is a well tolerated med by many...Not her though.

Not to be cruel, but it was like we were living in a bad movie when she was on that. Klonopin, and trazadone were the best thing that worked.

I pray for you both, it is very difficult for a parent, especially if you do not live nearby to want your child well, and cared for. Especially the more caring you want to give, the more rebellious to handle their own life they become.

Knowing what space, and when to step in is a thread thin line and huge heart ache. Can you ask the meds, tried ones, the strength and if she would accept if you could look up side effects for her. Explain there are things that someone outside can see different and you just want the best, not what she thinks is working for her. If not on meds. explain that many people have something to keep them focused and use the same meds. It is about having a full live not a lable.....
Hugs to you Mom,