Perhaps the word you are looking for is "mixed states."

However, these feelings can also be a normal response to something big a person is looking forward to, yet scared of at the same time. We dread it, we want it, we feel sad at the thought or lonely even, yet so excited. We feel like we are going to burst with the conflicting feelings. . . . and what I am describing is not bipolar. But it is hard to trust the feelings. I have a family member who had unstable bipolar for many years, often with the mixed states - said liked the emotion "grief" best only because she always could trust that was a genuine feeling. The rest she could never be sure of. Me - it was the depression I could not trust in myself.