Well I am not married and don't live with my mom but she is my biggest support. When I cry from pain she does as well. She says there is nothing worse then seeing your child suffer. Anyhow the first year of this my mom became so depressed and isolated. In the past few years she has begun to push herself more. She is taking a knitting class and meeting with friends. I truly feel it is important for our loved ones to have a life outside of this. To have a break so to speak for them can help them deal with our condition.
I also agree about support groups and or therapy.
On a side note things do change on every level with rsd. You may not be able to do what you could before together but this is the time to find what you can do. So for example my mom and I started playing board games or go out to eat by the water which both of us really like. I am trying to follow this train of thought in my life in general. There is a lot that one can't do with this but there are new things that you may find you can do and enjoy. I know it is not the same but any brighter times is helpful.
Lastly I understand the guilt feeling but it is not productive. I know one can't shut their thoughts and feelings off but maybe you can tell your significant other how you feel and work on ways to not see this condition as something you should feel guilty about. Am I making sense?