Dear pat e,
Watch those panic attacks don't get any worse. I know what they're like! They can change your life and grab a hold and bam, you never want to leave the house.
What I found was the more I understood them and how they work the better I can control them. The physiology I mean. How and why we actually panic and then we can realize that we can in some ways try to control the panic and that it's really a natural response to stress. You are overstressed with all you have going on!
Try to figure out when the attacks happen. See if anything can help. Relaxation techniques, breathing into a brown paper bag even helps.
Sometimes it's so hard... it's hard not to panic.
I wish you well. For now, just take on what you can from moment to moment, day to day.