Dear Mari,

maybe the increase will help and i should try it. i dosed out the depakote at 1200mg for 4 days (up from 1000).

i am tense about work even from home, so i think i will do think that, basically through Tue night, and i see my pdoc wednesday. so hard to know what to do. my pdoc is not famous for his med-tweaking knack.

i don't know if i can cut out the drinking at lunch. it's been every day or close a lot. i try. but i give in. and i don't know about here, but where i used to work that was breach of contract just being intoxicated on the premises - they wouldn't even have to pay me to leave. yet.... i do it.

i don't know how to argue for it keeping my afternoons sane but lets say that i am to the point of exploding in the morning.

today i have even considered the thought of receding myself. i don't want to end up unemployed again though. but i would be switching area this time anyway.

boss was 'apparently' pleasant friday afternoon. i hate the thought of the twists behind the appearance.

~ waves ~