Fish can think?? Hmmmmmmmmm I don't know your dx dns but if you are on heavy duty pain meds I know you have something "awful". People who have to live daily with pain are imho, very courageous just to rise each morning and face another day. Now throw in surviving a loved ones suicide and you have all the ingredients for severe depression.

Depression won't go away.not by itself..and depression caused by grief is a monster....come to think of it, I have a handout that I've used at our support group about that monster..will look for it and post it if I find it.

I wish our David would come and "talk" to you...you'd like him.