I am so sorry you are hurting BF. You have comforted me in the past, and I wish I could do the same for you. Anytime pain and depression attacks, that is when you need the most support. You are in my thoughts and prayers, even if I don' follow all the threads, ever since last year when I had my surgery. I hope there is just one moment of true peace in your life this very day. I do care about the people I meet here. It is not just cyber friends, good souls reside here. ginnie