:sigh: if it helps any to know this - you are not alone dear friend. There is no simple script to follow... we just do what we know... or think we know... and when our insides are in turmoil... we try to squash it ... wishing, with one swift blow, that "it" could be released...

Anti-depressants take a few weeks to kick in (as you well know)... and kick in, they will... they'll squash the pain...

but that doesn't take it away... just makes it easier to handle...

My oldest son is someone I really don't know... and I'm trying to know him and accept him for who he is... its difficult ... I lost him years ago... you know that.... he's back in my life ... and I hold on to what little I can.

taking a week off is a good decision... you might find you sleep a lot (or try) - its certainly a good escape...
.... or perhaps you'll work on a household project... but no matter what, try hard not to beat yourself up...

Addy