Quote:
Originally Posted by Dejibo
went out for a nice dinner with neighbors. the noise, the lights, the crowd, I felt like I was being assaulted. I flinched each time my friend spoke. She leaned in and asked if she was spittling on me when she spoke because she saw me flinch!  I had to explain that I was in an MS thing and I am easily overwhelmed by noise, lights and so forth. I cant even go out to dinner! It follows me everywhere! Why cant it wait in the car? Why cant it wait at home? I cant think, I cant walk, I cant focus and now when i get tummy meds that work I cant go out to eat? NOT FAIR! Dad gummit, not fair! |
My friends, especially my boyfriend, have a really hard time comprehending why I get in 'freak out mode' sometimes. I try to explain to them that messages run in the body at like 20,000 mph and due to the damage of this crappy disease, it has slowed all those messages down, so when there's 15 things going on all at once I get anxious and FREAK OUT real quick, I hate it. I had never been like that before MS came into my life. It's quite crazy how it reeks havoc on our bodies.
I totally would give mine back in a heart beat. I miss working 40 hours a week, I miss hanging in the hot heat and being active, I hated running, but I would LOVE to be able to run again.
I've had to reduce hours at work, so the owner is only allowing me 9-10 hours a week
My boyfriend said to me the other day when I was taking him to work.. "you're so lucky you can just lay in bed all day and don't have to go to work." and I just broke down and started crying. I know he wasn't trying to hurt my feelings or anything. But I would much rather be working and doing things that healthy 23 yr old do, but I can't because of all the limitations.
AND it REALLY hurts my feelings when my Grandma asks how I'm doing, and I mention that I've had alot of neuropathy that day and still can't feel my hands and she says in return "well if it makes you feel any better my back is just killing me." like no, not at all grandma. it makes me feel worse actually because you're 62 years old, you have years of wear and tear on your body, you are supposed to have aches and pains, I at the age of 23 should not feel like I am 48 on my insides...
people just don't get it.
If you find a place to return this icky disease let me know!
