Losing someone to a "conventional" death, while difficult, does not interfere with our happy memories of them. But suicide survivors often feel disconnected and "divorced" from the memory of their lost loved one. Because they chose to end their lives - to our rational minds, an inconceivable act - we are now in a state of conflict with them. At some point, we need to "reconcile" with them - and somehow, we have to accomplish this alone.

Unfortunately, this usually takes some time. For most survivors, it's a reward that lies somewhat down the road, after we have passed through all the fury of our emotional gauntlet and achieved acceptance - acceptance of our human limitations, of our loved one's debilitated condition, and of our lives as they now lay before us.

*Jeffrey Jackson Handbook for Survivors of Suicide