Today I am grateful for this forum! It is a place for me to let things go a place than nobody judges me and a place where i am not made to feel like an inconvenience!!

Today I am grateful to'sophie' who is fast becoming another important person on this forum I did feel better after I sent my 'moaney feeling sorry for myself post' as i cannot tell anyone else how i feel as noone understands like all of you do! I think i am going to talk her suggestion and start keeping a diary and maybe if i write how crap i feel down I wont feel like everything is too much!

I am also grateful that things are going good with the extra child staying with us. she has fit right in and both her and ellie both came into my room dressed this morning having made there beds ( without being asked) so all i had to do is the hair styles ( which i have to say are getting more interesting each day)


Finally i know i say it lots but I am so grateful to have a hubby like i do! what would i do without his support, Tom never judges me and he tells me every night he prays to god that he can take some of my pain so that i do not have to have it on my own! he has never said "why me" about his own situation that he finds himself in being the one who has to nearly do everything round here. He has never said that he would like "out" or a "normal wife" so I guess i have to be grateful and I have to keep pushing and try to find my smile again! if he has not given up on me I guess he must still see some of what he married still alive in me!!

to all of you thank you for listening and ur advice the other day its 8.37am and the sun is getting hotter. Maybe today can be a good day!!