Dear RSDjaded and All,
I am so touched by all your postings. As Lorigood243 posted "it is or a labor of love as my hubby says , to care for me." I nearly lost it on that one! It brought tears to my eyes for sure. I was thinking when you said due to your financial situation you cannot afford counseling...I was thinking if there is a Catholic Church in your area they sometimes have free (or a sliding fee scale) couselors. It is called Catholic Social Services. Some churches have them so call your nearest church rectory for info on where there is one in your area. I know they are nationwide. Also, contact any church in your area as they may have or have knowledge of others in the area such as a pastor of a church or support groups in the area. It is soooo important to get your emotional feelings out...even crying is very important as you are releasing negative feelings.

I was married for 9 years but have been single for the last 15 years or so (who's counting). I've been single with rsd so I have never had anyone to care for me. It is very lonely but I have a very strong son who is an amazing young man. He has endured alot (and lost a mom who was athletic and did everything with him) but has learned we all have to go through things and it is just how you deal with it that determines if you make it. After six years my family just doesn't get it at all and I am tired of continually trying to educate them. Today, my sister even said "Oh Monday is a holiday and your home health aid will be off." I just laughed because when you are disabled you NEVER have a day off. Each day blurs into the next one. But people that have not had any chronic condition just do not get it or they do get it but want to stay in denial over it all.

Please do not give up looking for a counselor. It is really important and for your kids too. I have learned as a mom that I have to take care of myself in order to take care of my son and others. Try to do things with your husband that he can do such as sitting in the park while the kids run around playing or watching a sunset. These things are free and will really keep you all together. It is the little things that get you through the day. I try to laugh each day and I pray alot. It gets me though it all. And I have a cat and dog that keep me laughing. They are my little angels here on earth. I hope we can help you here. We are here for anyone with rsd or chronic pain. Please do not hesitate to vent or ask for any help here. THis is the best group of friends you will ever want!!
Best of luck,
kathy d