Yeah...no thanks. If that's what it takes to 'live' then count me out...lol!

But seriously...it was the doctor who took me off the Lyrica in favor of the Cymbalta (which clearly didn't work out). I don't have any more refills on the Lyrica either so it's not like I can go back on it now. Which may be causing some of the other problems, increase in pain, etc. But things are so bad these days that I don't know what are symptoms of what's wrong with me, what are side effects from medications, what are side effects from withdrawal from the medications...it's so confused now that I'm not really shocked that the doctors can't sort it out either. I just wish someone would really take the reins and hopefully that will come soon.

And...yeah...I hate that I even have to have an attorney to be an advocate for me when it comes to work comp...I wish they would just do what they are supposed to and not play games...but then again there are a lot of things I wish that just aren't a reality and I have to deal with that is rather than what isn't.

In more positive news, my primary care doctor ordered at home physical therapy and for the first time I am feeling optimistic about a treatment. I'm still worried about how far I can push with the pain as bad as it is...but then again it's so bad already that what's a little more in a good cause (the good cause being working towards getting me walking again...even a little). So I am pumped about that. Would feel better if we were able to get the pain even moderately under control...but I need to just keep working on that as a seperate issue and focus on what I can control. And what I can control is going at this physical therapy with a focused and determined attitude, do my exercises every day, and maybe it will even help with the pain a little. You know...trying to get out of the cycle of not using it, the pain gets worse, I use it less, so the pain gets even worse...I'm thinking long term and that the pain I feel now after doing the physical therapy is going to get me in a better place in the future.