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Old 06-12-2011, 10:56 AM
Dejibo's Avatar
Dejibo Dejibo is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 7,332
15 yr Member
Dejibo Dejibo is offline
Elder
Dejibo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 7,332
15 yr Member
Default My mom and I had a horrible fight. I quit.

After many many years of trying to hold it together and try to help with the family, my mother went off the deep side yesterday and accused me of stealing tons of things from her. She had many hurtful intentional things to say and went on spraying venom till she knew my wounds were open raw and bleeding. I told her that if she didnt stop she was cutting off the fragile bridge that hold us together, and keeps me calling even now and again. She told me where I could stick my bridge.

Painful, wounded, bleeding and fed up, I told her it would be a very long time before she ever heard from me again, unless she called to apologize I didnt want to know a thing. She is angry because I wont take over the executor of her estate while she leaves my drug addicted sister with a key to the house, and all of the insurance policies in my neices name. In other words, my sister gets ALL the items in the house, my niece gets all the money, and I get the bill. I made a deal with her that her 3 other children would band together, make sure her bills got paid, her estate given out as she wished, and that her accounts closed, and the remaining money goes to her grandchildren. She called us all thieves, liars, and only wanted her money. WHAT MONEY?! she has 3 insurance policies. One for 2k one for 3k and one for 5k. She borrowed against the 5k policy years ago and didnt pay it back. She stopped paying on the 3k policy years ago, and they cancelled it. she has 2k total to bury her, pay her accounts, get death certs and so on. NOTHING left. There isnt enoug money to bury her! So, she wants my neice to get whatever money is in the accounts, and let the rest of us pay to bury her. isnt that fair? Um NO!

It was a horrible fight, and after decades of trying to help her...I quit. Im done. I am tired of being accused of stealing things that were gifted to me. Like when I had my father buried at sea with the Navy I had to have a photo to send with him. She chose the photo, and when the service was over accused me of stealing his ashes from her, and the photo. She talked horribly about my father in life, and in death and in the end I caught her using his ashes as a door stopper! I told her to say her goodbyes because come sunrise he was going with me and I was having a service planned for his remains. I had the navy take him as he was career navy and it was a beautiful service. My mom has ruined 5 of the tapes I sent her of the service and keeps asking for more. So, yeah, I did steal him, but she gave me the photo for the service, and now she has lost her mind and is lashing out in vicious ways that are cruel and uncalled for.

Sadden, bruised, and bleeding, im walking away. I dont care if the phone rings, she can tell it to the answering machine. Now my druggie sister has been leaving messages wanting to know what I did to HER mother. How dare I upset HER mother that way! OMG it just never ends, so...I decided to get off the merry go round.

Thank you for all of the encouragement thru the years as I struggled with this old woman, but as of this moment, I simply cant take it anymore. I am tired of crying. I am tired of being called names. I am tired of being accussed. I am tired of tapping out my wallet to bail out mom because mom bailed out sis. UGH! so...

I feel 150 pounds lighter. I no longer accept that she is my responsibility to raise, help, heal, carry, or drag thru life. I forgive her for the horrible childhood. I forgive her for the horrible adult hood. I forgive her for never making ANY contact with my children while smother the drug addicts children with love and affection. I forgive her all of it. and now I am forgetting. I release her back to the universe from which she came. She is beyong my control, my help, my love, and my interventions. I wish her well, I wish her great love, but mostly I wish her out of my life. im so tired of the constant drama, and BS and lies, and manipulations. I just cant and wont do it any more.

Thanks for allowing me to make this declaration public. im done.
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