Phyllis, I think we (as women) often read more into things than men do. He probably doesn't even realize that you are upset by the fact he hasn't added you to his FB "friends" list.

I used to overthink things and come to my own conclusions only to find out later that I had gotten all worked up for no reason.

I've been single now for close to 10 years. My DH passed away in 2001. I dated a few men and had a couple of "relationships" since then but learned that I just don't have the emotional energy to invest in a new relationship.

Maybe Joe wanted more of a relationship with you and your email made him realize that you aren't interested in him "that way". He could possibly be pulling away to protect his feelings? I don't know...just a thought. Maybe just give him some time and he'll come around. It sounds like he's had alot of hurt in his life. I can understand his wanting to protect his heart.