Hey WDT- Regarding the Trial, my thread has a bunch of that down on a day by day basis and you can find it here: http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread117854.html

Regarding pain and faith and missing out on things, well that is pretty much covered in the thread too, but I have had a deep dependence upon God for a long long time, and I believe God has seen me through so much that all I can say is I feel blessed. I missed out on some school plays, family movie nights at the theatre, sports events because I just hurt too much. I refused to give up going to church, because I felt it was God carrying me through the pain and I wanted to worship. I had sung on the worship team for years and played bass. Those I had to drop [although now I am back to singing as Rae can attest]. So, I would lie in the pew, my head on my wife's lap, and tears would fall from my eyes the pain was so bad. I finally missed a Sunday or two right before the first of my deep back surgeries because I was screaming in pain by then and nothing was functioning anymore.

Even so, with pain, God has been my constant companion as has my wife. The young ones, well they did drive me around when I needed driving, but the pain I suffered eventually drove our daughter into counselling because she began to feel so down that I hurt as I did. For a while she could not acknowledge and was angry with God, although I let her know that without God, without the many prayers I received things could have been MUCH worse.

I have been praying for you, and hope you will be embraced in His arms as your appointment time approaches so that all may ultimately be well,
Mark56z