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Originally Posted by bizi
Dearest waves, I love reading the in depth stories that you tell.
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Thanks Bizi.
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how do you feel about this?
Do you want to get another therapist or can you "change " your current tdoc/pdoc?
bizi
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i don't think i can "change" anything more than minimal aspects, but when i have tried to address the 3 "big" areas i brought up in my first post i have not succeeded - and it's been a long time trying.
i've often put to myself, if it hadn't been for the money thing, would i have left already? of course conscience and sense of debt prevents me from even entertaining that notion for too long.
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Originally Posted by Dmom3005
Waves
I have to say, I would hate it if you didn't post all these nice long threads.
s.
I learn so much when you do.
I too wait on your thought |
LOL
thank you, Donna! You're such a sweetie.
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Originally Posted by Mari
Dear Waves,
One option is to find a DBT group that would be an alternative to the current doc. You could find some workbooks and audios.
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i'm looking but not finding. aside from finding groups that are not near me, most are inpatient or require a Borderline Personality dx. I would like someone i could just have as a therapist, who could teach me to improve, say, stress tolerance, for starters - one of the basic elements used in DBT. THAT ONE THING would help me a lot.
i wonder if i can find someone specializing in DBT who ALSO takes other patients... so i could benefit from some of the DBT aspects without doing the full-blown thing. There just doesn't seem to be much DBT here. It kinda surprises me. It's not that new at this point. Maybe i'm not looking in the right places. Or maybe it is still very much in the private sector and i don't have visibility ... you have to know someone who knows someone...
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Can you take a 4 month break from him to try someone else? You agree with him that the forth month is temporary?
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i've taken a break before. but it was like 5
weeks. a sudden 4
month break - and TELL him i am therapist-shopping???
i don't think i could do that, no. it would be mega-WEIRD. i could try something like saying i only want to do 1ce a month, and then see a different one once a month... until i figure out what's what... then maybe by the time i'm 90 i'll find someone???
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Find out if this is true. Can you keep the pharmacological management guy and find someone else (not permanent) for talk therapy about feelings.
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problem is the only person i can ask is my pdoc. this reveals that i am wishing to leave/unhappy with therapy. perhaps that would be a good thing to reveal. but not the part about looking around...
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Considering finding a new therapist requires: [Mari's list with answers inline:]
- instense dissatisfaction at the status quo - check.
- willingness to deal with change - check
- and trust in onself that one can make the right decisions - NO
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i guess i fail a prereq's huh. and then there's the letting go bit which is a personal prereq that i fail with flying colors. but assuming i passed all prereqs with flying colors, i don't know how to go about looking.
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You can change when you are ready. Take your time.
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I may never be ready, just like i never would have been ready to start working again. furthermore i found previous writings similar to this post .... one dates back to
2005 - i am
certainly taking my time... i daresay too much of it.
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Originally Posted by Dmom3005
They don't just go find a new one and leave old ones to the side.
Donna |
sometimes they take a trip across the ocean they don't want to take, thinking they're coming back. and then the world turns around and says, sorry, not today, not tomorrow. and then the friends drift away... move from phone to e-contact to nothing at all. and i think in our age bracket it is hard to make new friends. i am so grateful i have you guys.
thank you all so much for your replies.
So much food for thought. i am thinking how i can do part of this or a little of that... i am thinking. thank you. and any more innovative ideas welcome.
~ waves ~