Bless your hearts ~ Both of you are going thru some pretty rough times.

I'm a chronic painer -- and have been for more than 25 years. I've had 2 open spinal surgeries which have left me disabled & in lots of pain. I take pain meds, but that barely touches it. I am also on SS disability.

My late husband also had spinal problems and was a chronic painer. Between the two of us, we couldn't make one good body! LOL Before he got ill with his final illness, he had to do most of the stuff around here because I was in worse condition than he was. I tried to do what I could -- but would always pay for it the next few days.

But I did "take over" some of the more stressful chores, like paying of the bills, talking with insurance companies about their payments to providers, or their lack thereof. In other words, I basically did all the "accounting." Then I managed to do the dusting -- I'd have to rest in-between, but it go done. If he carried the laundry to the laundry room, I did the washing/drying. We both cooked -- when I cooked, I sat on a tall stool. Sometimes I just couldn't do ANYTHING -- and it was the same with him. We just took care of the important stuff, and the rest could wait.

As far as the physical -- we had to experiment. You have to find what is the most comfortable for you and that's by trial & error. As long as you're both patient with the other, you'd be surprised what you can do. LOL And maybe it WASN'T as frequent as it used to be, but it was enjoyable.

I wish I had the answers to everything, but I don't. But as long as you love each other, and you're patient -- you'll be fine. God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee