Uncertain - most importantly, please know you are so far from alone in how you feel. I was living with the pain which began in my neck in 2000 and had 4 surgeries to correct it as it progressed downward for ten years before finally being properly diagnosed. I can't even count the number of doctors and surgeons I met with, the procedures I endured which worsened my condition and the incorrect diagnoses including being told more then a handful of times that it was all in my head.

I was finally properly diagnosed at the Hospital for Special Surgery in NY in November 2010 and have spent the past 9 months receiving as much Keta ine as possible from a 5 day inpatient treatment there, to outpatient boosters with Dr. Shwartzman for 6 months and now with another Doctor.

I would say it really took me until about 2 months ago to accept my diagnoses, let go of that search for the "one magic missing piece of the puzzle that would cure it" and learned to accept and live with it.

I think it's very much like the mourning process because the way I saw it, I was mourning my past and who I had been and fighting letting go and becoming who I am now. Had I realized I'm not so different and if anything, a lot of changes have been positive, it probably would have been far easier on me and my family.

The most interesting part was around the same time I began to accept the disease, I also begN to go into remission. It's now been almost two months that my average pain level has been 0. That after having been called a severe case by Dr. Shwartzman just 9 months ago and having a pain level of 90 on a scale of 1-10.

Stress really is our greatest enemy and whether the timing of my acceptance and remission were coincidence or not, the sooner you can find a way to begin to accept, the less pain you will feel and the healthier you will become.

If you have not yet read it, I very highly recommend Barby Ingle's books, first RSD In Me would be the most helpful to you right now. Later, ReMission Possible is also an excellent read. Both books are wonderful as they are the first extremely well written, well researched and engaging written by a fellow RSD patient.

I hope some of this helps,
Dawn