So, so sad. Seems like nomatter what I do, no matter what meds, therapy etc the darkness persists. I have tried to just "lurk" but that does seem to help. I have tried working more, working less, it seems not to matter as far as my pain. Actually I am "safer" at work as it keeps me safe from me, I am getteing vacation this week and it scares me spitless. Yes I have a safety contract but not sure my safety net is up to helping me as he too is balancing on the knife edge also.