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Old 07-30-2011, 03:20 PM
kl2568 kl2568 is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 36
10 yr Member
kl2568 kl2568 is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 36
10 yr Member
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lcms0516 View Post
While I have never been teased about having Hydrocephalus, I do feel self-conscious about it.

The first girl I ever actually dated was not the summer right before I started my senior year of high school. I had so much trouble in school with grades and kids teasing me, just like every kid gets' teased, that I ended up not graduating until I was 20yrs.-old. The girl I dated between my junior and senior year, turned out to be 15yrs.-old and using me until her 'real' boyfriend was released from the county lockup. When she told me she wanted to breakup, she had a friend of hers call me at 2a.m. waking my father up. Her friend told me about the 'real' boyfriend having been released from the county lockup that night. I told her friend I wouldn't believe it until I heard it from my 'girlfriend'. At first she refused to tell me. I kept persisting, causing her to cry when she verbally verified it in the background. I don't know if it could be considered that I got sweet revenge on her but, I happen to run into her mother five years later and we had a nice chat. Her mother told me that, my ex-'girlfriend had dropped out of school, within months of us dating.

I met my future(now ex)wife the next year. We were 'unofficially' engaged for five years. During the engagement, she cheated on me and, I knew there was something just not mentally right with her, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I forgave her for cheating on me. During our eight-year marriage, despite her biological ability to bear children it always felt somehow(back then), that I was married to a child instead of a woman. When I had a Gran-Mal seizure(I have Epilepsy that resulted from the surgeries for the aneurysm and Hydrocephalus), despite all the info I had given her on my health, she just freaked and stared at me like a zombie.

When she left me at 4.75yrs. into the marriage, I told her at the six month point of the separation that I could legally file for divorce if I wanted to. She begged me not to, so I relented. The next year she told me that she had always wished that, my disabilities would 'just go away'. To me that was extremely ignorant and, it was then that I made the definite decision to divorce her. I didn't divorce her for another two years due to money. When I did, my parents along with her mother n' maternal grandparents were at the courthouse. When it was finalized, my ex-wife reacted by crying hysterically and going around suddenly hugging her mother, my mother and my step-mother.

The answer to her obviously odd behavior was finally answered four years after the divorce when my ex-wife was finally diagnosed as being disabled. I don't know what the actual diagnosis is, but my mother n' step-mother have always felt my ex-wife was mentally retarded. I personally didn't(and still don't) feel that description accurately fit my ex-wife's behavior. But she definitely(and finally) had admitted to being disabled. Her denial was perpetuated by her parents, who I had revered for years.

Now I am in a relationship that has lasted four years. My girlfriend and her parents accept me without reservation. But why did it take practically thirty years for a woman to accept me.
lcms0516 I really dont know why it took that long for that to happen. I wish I could give yuo an answer. It is very frustrating but I am happy that someone accepted you for who you are. I just dont want to end up feeling like this forever because if I do then I will never get anywhere. I don't know how to break out of it. I just don't want to get hurt. People tell me to ignore the people who say things like that but how can I tell which people won't use it against me and which ones will.
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