Man today was one of those days. One of my boys is kinda having a crisis, he has a business promoting concerts. He had one bad show on new years eve, and took his first loss. Now he is scared to take risks.

My dilemma is that I wanted to help him, so falling back on all my life experience promoting casino business, and my own businesses. Which included lots of concerts, car shows, contests, and pretty much you name it. Plus the fact that before RSD I was one go getter, my motto was "If you ain't makin dust, your eatin it!"

So I went to motorvating him, but he was not having it. It seemed he was more interested in if I am a no excuse kinda guy, why do I use the excuse of RSD chronic pain? He had so many yeah buts, it was like selling a used car. I realized he was creating his own road blocks, and called him on it. He hung up!

After that I sat here thinking about what just happened, not angry at all, but just pondering my situation. He caused me to really reflect on what is going on with me. He is right, I used to be a take the bull by the horns type of guy. Lead by example. Proof that the only barriers are self created barriers.

Something I dearly want to do again, but am I hiding behind RSD? I am not hiding behind it, I am truly not as able as I once was. This is not in my mind, it is physically hindering me. So if I try to go out and show him how it is done, then I will pay dearly with off the charts pain. Heck it nearly is off the charts now with no pain meds to speak of and not doing anything at all. If I continue doing what Im doing, then I am not setting a very good example.

Kinda stuck between the two. I really didnt know what to tell him now. He knows what I accomplished before RSD, and my mindset, so I can see why he questions me about my barriers. But I know he is able bodied, and only his lack of self confidence, and lack of can do attitude is stopping him. There is nothing he has to weigh in the balance before he does anything. He is healthy, unlike me.

So how do you go about motivating someone that sees you letting something be a barrier, when you never had any barriers before?

Part of me wants to just suck it up so to speak, and go out and hurt myself in the process of proving that despite RSD I CAN do it. The other part of me knows that would be suicide!

I feel like Im really losing out on life now.