Sorry if this is an encore of the pity party thread, but that is how I feel this rainish Sunday morning. No, I don't always feel like this, but today I do.

I miss the days when I could look forward to something with no asterisk next to it: *if I feel like it, if there are bathrooms near, if it's accessible, if it's not too hot that day, if it doesn't last too late, if this symptom goes away, if my shoes fit that morning...

...*if I'm feeling up to driving, if there won't be too much commotion, if there is air conditioning, if I can sit near an exit, if I sleep the night before...

...*if I can bow out at the last minute, if I have my wits about me, if it's not raining so I can bring my rollator, if my other medical issues aren't acting up...

Don't mean to be such a wet blanket this morning, but I just can't remember the last time I purely looked forward to something. I don't mean that I worry all the time that something bad is going to happen. It is what it is, and with God's help I'll try to make the best of it.

It's just the reality of MS for me, that nothing is as simple as it used to be, back when I could plan something, actually expect to DO it, and have reasonable expectations of enjoying it.

Okay, I'm done now.